bullied

Yesterday, something happened that has made me quite angry with myself. Late last night, I made a run to the grocery store because I lost the “who can hold out the longest without milk” game.

Anyway, I’m pushing my grocery-filled cart out to the dark, quiet, empty-feeling parking lot, and this man comes up to me, talking very fast about how he needs money because someone (he points vaguely at the dark back shadows of the lot) just had a heart attack and he needs to buy gas to get this person to a hospital in Springfield, Virginia.

Now, rationally, I know that none of that makes sense. If someone had a heart attack, you’d not be going to Springfield (where is Springfield, VA, anyway?) You’d be calling freaking 911 and waiting for the nice free ambulance to arrive. But at the time, the only th8ing going through my head was

“Don’t mug me don’t mug me don’t mug me don’t mug me.”

And I gave him a dollar, shaking like a leaf. I hate that I did that. Hate hate hate! Am I such a coward?

He then of course, proceeds to the next lonely woman a few rows down, who laughs, loudly, whips out her cell phone and says, loudly, “THIS GUY IS COMING UP TO ME IN THE PARKING LOT ASKING FOR MONEY TO DRIVE TO THE HOSPITAL ISN’T THAT RIDICULOUS? I’M AT THE GROCERY STORE AND THIS GUY IS JUST WANDERING AROUND THE PARKING LOT. HA HA HA.”

The guy disappeared.

Why can’t I have the presence of mind to do that? What’s wrong with me?